Running fast but going nowhere

Well, I took my own advice today as far as a Resolution goes. I got up at the butt-crack of dawn and ran on the treadmill. Actually it was more of a walk with two minutes of running thrown in.

Why would I subject myself to this early morning torture? Because I’m getting to the point that I’m afraid to sit down. I seriously think that my shirt buttons are going to start flying off and put someone’s eye out.

I’m also afraid to buy bigger clothes because then I’ll become too comfortable with my fatness and not try to lose any weight. Then in another year or so, I’ll start the whole process over again. Life’s just a giant treadmill in that way, running fast but going nowhere.

Here’s the thing, I started exercising a week before Christmas. I’ve been fairly consistent, meaning, I’ve been consistently running on the treadmill, sporadically, 1-3 times a week for five weeks now. When I stepped on the scale yesterday, I was very surprised to learn that I was exactly the same weight I was five weeks ago. I mean, I did have BBQ ribs three days in a row, but still, I should have lost something right?

So now I’m just going to make my exercise plan part of my after work routine. I have a gym literally eighteen steps from my office door. And if you can’t make it to the gym when it’s that close, you’ll never make it no matter where it is.

Honestly, I haven’t really thought about weight too much until this year. And I’m starting to find out it’s only because I can’t lose it like I used to that I’m thinking about it at all. All through my life I’ve been able to drop 10 or 15 pounds in a week or two. Now I haven’t dropped any in five weeks. Looks like I’ll have to cut out my cake, cookies, and Ben and Jerry’s. But my wife is making Brats tonight, so maybe I’ll just have to do an extra fifteen minutes on the treadmill because I’m definitely having two of those puppies. And I'll just have to see what she has for desert before I make up my mind on that, because life’s just a giant treadmill in that way, running fast but going nowhere.


Check out my short-stories on my “pythons” and manners published at
http://www.bartlebysnopes.com